PART I - FROM THE DIARY OF AN ANONYMOUS LADY
02 - 08 - 2008
Mangalore
The train was two hours late. It was 11AM when we reached Mangalore. Meera was already very tired by then. I smiled thinking of the fact that the trip was actually her idea. A girls' weekend. Me, Meera and Maya. Ever since Maya got posted in Mangalore, we haven't seen her. She was waiting for us in the platform. She has become plump. It was obvious that she is eating a lot of junk food. No surprise in that, considering the fact that she is also a Software Engineer, like us. We went to Maya's house. For a brief time we shared the gossips about our friends. (We girls can't change that habit, can we?) We had a tight schedule. We are to return by Mangalore Mail which leaves at 4.30 PM tomorrow. Our plan was to visit Mookambika Temple on the first day, and roam the city in the next day. (There were some Kannada girls in our hostel at Chennai. They were all very pretty. Let's see how the boys are.)
Well, we were not exactly the deeply religious, temple loving mallu girl prototypes. But we wouldn't have got permission from our parents for this journey if it was just a pleasure trip. So Maya proposed this idea of including Mookambika temple in our itenary. I still remember my phone conversation with Amma [mother].
Me: Amma, we are planning a trip to Mangalore
Amma: From your office?
Me: No amma. Just me and Meera. Maya is now working in Mangalore. She has invited us for the weekend.
Amma: I don't think your father will give permission for this. Who will be there to help you if something happens to you and Meera, in train.
Me: Amma, if that is the problem, I can invite Arun to come with us. His friends are also there. He can stay with them.
Amma: Arun! Why are you still in contact with that useless boy. If he is going to be with you, I will never allow you to go to Mangalore.
Me: OK. I am not calling Arun. Will you grant me permission now?
Amma: Well, I will try to talk to your father. I can't give you any assurance.
Me: Amma, it is very important for Meera. Her mother called a few days back. It seems there is some problem in her horoscope. Her astrologer has said that if she prayed at Mookambika temple, her marriage will take place in this year itself. Please understand, amma.
Amma: Silly girl, you could have said this earlier. If that is the case, there is no problem. I will make sure that your father will raise no objection. And make sure that you also pray very well for a good husband. I hope your marriage also will be possible in this year itself.
Me: Love you amma. I will call you later.
So amma will be now in our home, dreaming about my marriage with Prince Charming. I bet Meera also would have had a similar conversation with her parents. Since we had told our parents that we will go to Mookambika, they will expect us to bring them some prasadam. And they will also ask a lot of questions about the temple. So there was no way we could skip the temple visit and roam around the city today. Mangalore city will have to wait for us till tomorrow morning. After lunch, we set out for Kollur.
The temple was located in picturesque surroundings presented by the banks of the river Sauparnika and the lush green Kudajadri hill. It is believed that Shree Adi Shankara perceived the idea of having a Mookambika Devi temple at Kollur and himself installed the idol of deity in the temple some 1200 years ago.
The custom is to take a dip in river Sauparnika before visiting the temple. Sauparnika was flowing very violently unlike the rivers in Kerala. Venturing more than a few feet from shore was dangerous. Initially Meera and Maya took dip in it while I stood on the shore with a towel for them. When they came back, I went down the steps, to the river. The water was very cool. Closing my eyes, I took the first dip. It was a new sensation to me. I froze totally. I felt like I am being part of the river. I don’t know what gave me the courage, but I walked a few more steps forward to take the next dip. I took the second dip. Again I felt that strange sensation. I cannot describe it, but one thing I was sure. It was divine. By the third dip, I felt like I already had my meeting with God. When I came back on shore, I got scolded by Maya. It seems I walked too far into the river that water level was just above my neck. They said they also shouted to come back. But I don't remember being neck-deep in water. I haven't heard any shouting from them. I heard only the sound of Sauparnika.
After walking for some time, we reached the temple. There were no crowds or queues. It was a calm and peaceful atmosphere. This was totally new to us. Before entering the complex that housed the sanctum sanctorum, we have decided to perform pradakshinam [customary circling around the sanctum sanctorum]. There were small complexes of other deities along the path. It should have been ended as a normal temple visit. Little did I know then that it was not to be.
We were praying in a small complex set aside for Lord Ganapathy. There were three large bells in all complexes which the devotees can ring themselves. (This was also something not usually seen in temples in Kerala.) I rang one of them. It was then that I noticed the nearby complex of Lord Siva. A mother was praying there. Her two daughters were standing behind her. The elder girl could have been about 17-18 years old. She rang the bell and then started praying. The younger girl could have been about 12-13 years old. Her face was very attractive. When I saw her, I felt the same sensation which I felt while dipping in Sauparnika. That girl wanted to ring the bell, but she couldn’t reach for it. Her mother and sister moved on to the next complex. But she remained there to have another try. She jumped for it. Still she couldn’t reach for it. Then she saw that I was noticing her. Embarrassed, she smiled at me. It seemed like there was a halo around her face when she was smiling. I didn't know what I was doing then. I went near her and lifted her in my arms. She rang the bell.
The sound of bell rang in my ears. But along with that, I also experienced the sound of flow of Sauparnika in my ears. I also experienced a lot of other sounds which I couldn't identify. After a few seconds I recovered.
Me: Hi. What's your name?
She: Ambika
Me: Where are you from?
She: There
She pointed to towards the Kudajadri hills and ran away. I was dumb founded. Ambika - Mookambika - Kudajadri. Just then Meera and Maya joined me.
After completing the customary circling, we entered inside the main complex. The idol of Devi Mookambika shone in the light of diyas inside the sanctum sanctorum. I closed my eyes and prayed. And when I opened my eyes, I noticed that the face of idol resembled that of the girl I met just a few minutes back. I tried to ignore it as an illusion. I closed my eyes and prayed for some more time. I again looked at the idol. I was convinced that the face bore a striking semblance to that little girl. I rushed out of the temple to look for the girl. I saw the mother and the elder daughter walking away. The younger girl was nowhere to be seen. Then I walked around the main complex. Still I couldn't find her. I was confused. Was this whole thing a delusion? Was it possible that my mind has created the girl? I thought of it during the entire return journey to Mangalore. By now I am convinced. That girl was Devi Mookambika herself. I saw her, touched her and talked to her. Do you believe me?
PART II - FROM AMBIKA'S DIARY
02 - 08 - 2008
Kollur
Today is amma's pirannal [birthday]. Every year, we come on this day to Mookambika to pray. Archa is becoming bossy day by day. She may be my elder sister, but does she have the right to behave like my mother. A few days back, I asked her to put mehndi in my hand. I have seen her doing that to her friends. But when I asked, she refused and told me that she has no time for that. She doesn't have time for her little sis! Yesterday, while I slept a bit in the bus and fell on her shoulders, she woke me up and scolded me. Today was the extreme. After we visited the sanctum sanctorum, we proceeded to do the pradakshinam. While praying infront of Lord Siva, she and amma rang the bells. The bells were a bit high for me to reach. I requested her to lift me up so that I too can ring the bell. But she totally ignored me.
I prayed to God to help me. And then, something happened.
Three chechis (chechi - an elder girl) were praying infront of Lord Ganesa. I saw that one of them was smiling at me. She was very beautiful. Her face seemed to be glowing. I smiled at her and tried to reach for the bells again. Still I couldn't reach it. Then she walked over to me and lifted me. I rang the bells thrice. She asked my name and I replied. Then she asked where I am from. I was confused. If I tell her the name of my small village, she may ask further questions like where it is, is it far away... Amma and Archa were already walking away and I will have to hurry. The lodge where I was staying was on the base of a hill. I pointed to that direction and ran away to catch up with Archa.
We came out of the temple in a few minutes. But her face stayed in my mind. It reminded me of someone I have met earlier. But I couldn't determine who it was. Slowly I began to think that the chechi may have been sent by the God to help me. I decided to meet her again. I told amma that I need to ring the bell again and that I will be back soon. Since she knew that I am familiar with the temple, she agreed and told me that they will wait for me in the nearby shop. I ran to the place where I met her earlier. She was not there. Then I went to the inner complex. There I saw the two other girls praying in front of the sanctum sanctorum. The chechi was nowhere to be seen. Then I realized where I have seen the face of that chechi before. The idol of Mookambika resembled her face. So she was God!
I have heard that God comes in different forms to help good people. I have decided to live as a better girl now onwards. I won't use Archa's shawl to wash my face again. I will not tie her hair to bed while she is sleeping. God, please be with me when I need help again.
AUTHOR'S NOTE
Our forefathers had put forward the concept of ‘Tat-Wam-Asi’ – the presence of Divine spirit in all forms of life. Hiranyakashipu’s son Prahlad had said that the God is present in pillars and rust and everywhere in this universe. Just like that this Divinity is omnipresent. But our mind is not developed enough to accept this reality. But in some rare circumstances, our mind gets enlightened to this fact and in those occasions we can feel the presence of that Divine power in us or in someone else.
Even though most of the characters in this story are imaginary, some characters are indeed real, but with names changed. The story is based on some of my experiences during my visit to Mookambika.
